ultra_mega_diss_tracks_on_the_cobfandomcom-20200216-history
Laurel
Laurel & Hardy VS Andy Griffith & Barney Fife '''is the 9th episode of UMDTOTC ALPHA and the 17th battle overall! It features comedic groups Laurel & Hardy and Andy Griffith & Barney Fife from The Andy Griffith Show in a battle of comedic duos in the black-and-white era! '''Battle Length: 1:10 Dissers All played by Bob-crust! * Laurel * Hardy * Andy Griffith * Barney Fife Lyrics is in Light Gray, Hardy is in Gray, Andy Griffith is in Brown-Yellow, and Barney Fife is in Light Orange! Andy Griffith & Barney Fife - Verse 1: I’m Andy Griffith, the most famous classic actor since Van Dyke! I’m the god of the black and white era, I’m rocking this mic! You better gird your loins, busters. You gotta fight on your hands! I’ll call you guys Amelia Earhart, because your jokes never land! There once was a deputy called Fife, Who carried a gun and a knife for some dissing! To bad your shorts were cut short! Because Hardy-har died in the heart and little Laurel was so hurt! You hear that? You two timing, zero rhyming, unfit dirty hogs! Your comedy is quite odd, people collect your shorts like some weird pogs! While we our number one show of our generation! While your slack-sh*t, slap-stick was left forgotten by the nation! Laurel & Hardy - Verse 1: Try to mess with Oliver & Stan? I can’t watch a minute of your show I can’t stand! Our shorts are loved to death from here to there, to many distant lands! Your “Serious & Funny guy” format has been done a million time before! Are acts are original, you little moles! If seen most of your jokes before, I coulda swore. We are quite funny, we don’t even need to talk to make some hardy, charmings! But, from what we’ve observed, you guys tried so hard to be funny! It’s quite jarring! We can just get hit in the faces to be famous, you little disgraces! While only Grandmas and Grandpas watch you, we will be introduced to new ages for ages! Andy Griffith & Barney Fife - Verse 2: We work! Our important job is our perk! While you guys just drive around town getting yourselves hurt! You guys just to do something and just fail after fail! From trying to make a sail to a sale, that’s as bland and stale as some kale! ‘Cause you two are just two little brats! Even Hardy can argue with the facts were spitting, ya’ hacks! You guys take 30 minutes to carry a box upstairs, mates! Hardy, you stare at the screen like some fat rejected Office character, mate! Laurel & Hardy - Verse 2: We fail because that’s our act, we got show after show with our busy bodies! You guys need some help, mates. No one wants drama with hotties in a comedy! Let me Come Clean. We can do one thing, and one thing only! And still make it super funny, and MAKE THAT MONEY! We had hundreds of shorts, movies, and other things of that sort! After The Griffith Show ended, your careers went to sh*t! Abort! Abort! We got the funny hats and quirky suits to make you snear with joy! (Owwwh!) Everybody cheers with some feel-good applause! Come here, boy! (Ow!)